the three laws

I can't really take credit for this, since it's an extension of Hanlon's Razor, but I've organized it here into three convenient steps:

Bird's Razor
(a/k/a The Three Laws of Getting Along With People)

I. Never attribute to malice that which can adequately be explained by stupidity.

II. Never attribute to stupidity that which can adequately be explained by miscommunication.

III. When in doubt, assume miscommunication.

I've found that this process helps me understand people. Often times, we become so narrowly-focused in our work -- whether it be in the office, or with a group of friends or in organizing a party -- that we only see how things affect ourselves. This leads to the first problem: attributing an offense to malice. Once outside the fray, we may calm down and realize that the offender was not actively working to spite us, but we should then be careful not to write them off as "stupid." Without further evidence of the offender's motives, we can only assume there was a misunderstanding, and even then, it is often wise not to attempt to judge who bears more guilt in causing it. I suppose a fourth rule could be added regarding the difficulty of indicating voice inflection through the written word.

When I accepted these rules, my life became much less stressful in dealing with other human beings, and frankly, it would be nice if others did the same. :)