imnotagooddesigner

I was looking through some of my old backup CDs, and found this little controversy. Back when I was still looking for a full-time job -- August 25, 2002 to be exact -- someone placed this help wanted ad in the Cleveland Plain Dealer:

Help Wanted - Computer / Information Systems
Wanted Web Designer Subject is armed and dangerous with web design skills in Adobe Photoshop, Flash/MX, Dreamweaver - possibly ColdFusion and JavaScript. Offering considerable reward, including benefits. Notify extremely creative, noteable web design company immediately via e-mail at: imagooddesigner@aol.com
Published in The Plain Dealer on 08/25

I still think it's pretty lame, and doesn't really strike me as the work of a professional, "noteable web design company." It sounds to me more like two guys my age in their parents' basement trying to get a web design startup off the ground. Sure, yeah, it might indeed be a real company that's just looking for someone lighthearted and fun. I didn't plan on applying for this particular job, simply because I had no way of knowing who these people were and if their ad was truthful -- let alone the fact that I didn't know ColdFusion, had never used Dreamweaver (a professional web design firm using Dreamweaver?), and my knowledge of JavaScript was minimal.

Since it was an AOL address, that means they can use AOL Instant Messenger. Admittedly, not everyone on AOL uses the IM function, or even knows what it is (despite the fact that the Buddy List window seems to pop up every time you sign on, even after you disable it). Plus, they obviously only created this AOL account to receive resumes from this ad, so it's unlikely they ever intended to use the Buddy List feature even if they did know what it was.

However, I still thought it was strange that a "noteable web design company" was using an AOL address, but then again, they might have their reasons for wanting to remain anonymous. It could be a temp agency or recruitment service or headhunter, and they don't want to give away the company name because then you might apply straight to the company and they'd lose out on their finder's fee.

Still, curiosity got the best of me, and I wanted to know if this was indeed a real company and not just some guy who thought he'd make a cute pun off of the "wanted" half of "help wanted." I had no idea what their intentions might be, or why they thought this ad was professional, but I decided to IM imagooddesigner and try to find out. Here's what happened:

Me (10:15:16 AM): Hello there
Imagooddesigner (10:15:22 AM): Hi
Me (10:15:31 AM): I saw your ad in the Clevleand Plain Dealer
Imagooddesigner (10:15:34 AM): ok
Me (10:15:41 AM): Could you tell me a bit about the web design job?
Imagooddesigner (10:16:53 AM): Actually, no, I am not here to answer questions. If you are interested please email your resume as the ad states and we will review it.
Imagooddesigner (10:16:56 AM): Thanks.
Me (10:17:03 AM): Ok, thanks!
Me (10:17:28 AM): By the way, what is the name of your company?
Imagooddesigner (10:17:58 AM): obviously you can't follow instructions....perhaps you shouldn't bother sending your resume.

Could someone please tell me what exactly I said that pissed him off so much? No, wait, don't tell me, I already know: "By the way, what is the name of your company?" That's what set him off. Let's brainstorm some of the other possible responses he *could* have given:

• "Well we are a recruitment service, so unfortunately I'm not at liberty to divulge the name of the company offering this particular job."
  
• "We would rather have people send us resumes by e-mail, so we didn't publish the company name to avoid getting phone calls."
  
• "We're actually just two idiots with a computer in my parents' basement and don't have a name yet. But all of my friends know we're starting this company, therefore I claim we're 'noteable.' As for the 'benefits,' the satisfaction of working for two geniuses like us is benefit enough."

Now let's play the devil's advocate and brainstorm what else might have transpired here:

• The person who would normally be the friendly human resources director was on vacation, and some college kid was filling in that day. Having no people skills, when someone dared to ask for the name of the company, he got snarky and defensive. Well, not even really "defensive"... he had no defense. He simply told me I couldn't follow instructions so I shouldn't send my resume.
  
• E-mail was invited, IM was not. Of course, *no* company is going to ask for resumes over Instant Messenger, so it's pretty silly to assume I was attempting to apply for the job over IM. I had a simple question: WHAT IS THE NAME OF YOUR COMPANY? and he refused to answer it.
  
• "Here I am just going through my normal Monday routine, drinking my coffee and settling in to check the resume responses we got from our ad, and this asshole sends me this IM out of nowhere, demanding to know the name of my company. Pshaw! Let 'im have it!" Oh please, spare me the drama.
  
• "1) I'm anonymous and he doesn't know who I am in real life, nor does he know the name of my company, hence I can be a jackass; 2) it's not in my job description to answer Instant Messages; and 3) there are thousands of web designers out there, so pissing off one potential candidate doesn't matter, especially in this shitty economy."

All entirely possible, I suppose. In the case of the first bullet point there, I'm reminded of this incident where ABC's webmaster took it upon himself to reply to a viewer's e-mail, even though it was outside his job duties. I'd just like to ask that guy if it was really worth losing his job to have the satisfaction of debunking some homophobe's beliefs.

Another issue is, apparently I view Instant Messenger differently than other people do. I just consider it another form of communication, like the telephone or writing a letter. When companies only want mailed resumes and don't want phone calls, they generally say "no phone calls please" in the ad. I'm not saying imagooddesigner should have said "no IMs please," but if a company lists their street address in an ad and doesn't say "no phone calls please," it's not that unreasonable for someone to look them up in the phone book and call to ask for more information. In fact, those career guide pamphlets and books often recommend calling to get more information about the job and the company, so you can cater your cover letter and resume accordingly.

All that considered, I'm still having trouble understanding how asking for the company name made him so upset. He's quibbling on the fact that he said "I am not here to answer questions" and I went ahead and asked another question. I suppose instead I should have simply said, "Ok, thanks! I just wanted to know the name of your company" so as to avoid using that dreaded question mark. Or, had I known that would be his reaction, I would've politely asked for the company name right off the bat, instead of wasting my one-question quota on "Could you tell me a bit about the web design job?"

When I originally told this story to some friends back in 2002 (some of whom I talked to over IM, no less), the vast majority of them gave the guy the benefit of the doubt, and chastised me for "breaking the rules" and Instant Messaging him. They believed this was in fact a real professional web design firm that was simply looking for a creative, fun-loving designer. Did the conversation I posted above really warrant "chastising," as I call it? Well you see, that wasn't the end of the conversation. There was one more line I tacked on that sort of changes the mood of the whole situation, and I believe that is why my friends blamed me for imagooddesigner's arrogance:

Imagooddesigner (10:17:58 AM): obviously you can't follow instructions....perhaps you shouldn't bother sending your resume.
Me (10:18:27 AM): Ah, just as I thought. I suppose I wouldn't want to work for you, if your company does in fact exist.
"Imagooddesigner" signed off at 10:45:53 AM.

You see, I was going on the assumption that this ad was some sort of prank, or at the very least, untruthful (Area Temps is known for their misleading help wanted ads, so it wouldn't be the first time a company exaggerated their claims). Because I made that assumption, the people I told this story to were out to prove me wrong. When you add that last line, it appears that I'm just as snarky as I found him to be. By leaving that out, we can actually have a polite brainstorming session about what this ad is really for and who imagooddesigner really is.

Who knows; by posting this here in my blog, maybe someone will be Googling for "imagooddesigner" and will read this and enlighten me with the truth.