today on Spy Time

As the description of my blog says, part of the purpose of this running commentary is to keep up-to-date all the people spying on me. So here's one for those wishing to commit identity theft:

WHAT'S YOUR:
ringtone: Theme from Jurassic Park (dun Dah, dunt DAH! da-da-DA, da-Da da-DA)
middle name: Bill
job: Graphic Artist/Freelance Musician
sign: Taurus

RIGHT NOW:
the closest thing to your left hand: uh, the keyboard
what's in your pockets: wallet, pen, keys, gum, eyedrops
are you hungry: nay
are you thirsty: double nay
what are you sitting on: office chair
where are you: home
is the light on: si

ONE OR THE OTHER:
cat or dog: definitely, definitely dawg
cookies or candy: in the short term, both; long term, cookies always win
kiss or hug: how about a smile and a wave from a comfortable distance? oh, I mean... hug.
school or work: "I wish I could go back to college / life was so simple back then..."
shower or bath: shower
Cingular or Verizon: Cingular - it's nice actually getting reception!
ps2 or Xbox: neither; I just use my PC
whipped cream or cherries: cherries

FAVORITE:
animal: beagles!
coin: my lucky cancer-preventing silver dollar
drink: Mike's Hard Lime is pretty high on my list, although a Woodchuck is always good
pokemon: HEY, I'M GONNA TAKE YOUR ROOSTOR AND PUT IT IN THIS BAG, WHERE IT WILL FLOURISH OR EXPIRE, DEPENDING ON FATE! HEY! IS THAT A GOOD IDEA? ROOSTORS AREN'T LIKE CHUCHUNEZBIES. THEY HAVEN'T THE HEART FOR SUCH ENDEAVORS. OH??

RANDOM:
how many fingers do you have: 10, last I checked -- or is this some pedantic trick question where I'm not supposed to include the thumbs?
what do you wish you were doing right now: getting ready for bed, or eating ice cream. or a funnel cake.
what's the last thing you bought: dinner at Arby's
are you wearing a belt: but of course.

LAST:
drink: Dr Pepper
meal: Arby's
words you said: "But you can't because she is in Canadaaaaaaaaa!"
words you typed: umm... "But you can't because she is in Canadaaaaaaaaa!"
place you went: Bob W's for a rehearsal with the OldKids
person you thought about: Kristy, since I copied this from her blog
Where did you take your default photo: Not sure what this means, but I assume it's some Xanga/LiveJournal/MySpace thing that doesn't apply to me.

What is your current problem? I've started chewing on my fingers again.

What makes you most happy? Having such great friends I can do stuff with.

If you could go back in time, and change something, what would it be? I think I'd go back and not get cancer this time. Having gone through it, I can't really say that my life is better for it.

Ever have a near death experience? Nay.

Name an obvious quality you have? Wry humor.

What's the name of the song that you're listening to? "Come Back to Texas" (Bowling for Soup)

Any celeb you would marry? Unlikely.

Name someone with the same birthday as you? Ho Chi Minh, Malcolm X, Pol Pot, Andre the Giant

Ever sang in front of a large audience? Oh yeah.

What do you usually order from Starbucks? I ask for directions to the nearest Caribou Coffee.

Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? I once had a driver's license photo that made me look like Eugene Levy

Do you still watch kiddie movies or kiddie TV shows? I re-watch the ones from my childhood, e.g. Ducktales, Animaniacs

Are you comfortable with your height? Sometimes I'd like to be an inch or two taller, but on the whole I'm happy with it.

Do you speak any other languages? Sadly, no.

What magazines do you read? None on a regular basis.

Have you ever ridden in a Hummer limo? Those ugly monstrosities of an excuse for man's contempt for nature? Doubtful. Next you'll be asking if I park a Honda Element in the front yard as a lawn ornament.

Has anyone you're really close with, passed away? I guess I was pretty close with Belle, our last dog.

Do you ever watch MTV? Nay.

What's something that really annoys you? When people don't follow The Three Laws of Getting Along with People

my new york sense is tingling

As most readers of this blog know, street scenes for the upcoming Spider-Man 3 movie are being filmed in downtown Cleveland because it's cheaper to close roads here than in New York City. Although it was annoying trying to find a parking spot on Monday, it was amusing to see a yellow New York cab with an Avenue Q ad board on top. I wish I had remembered that my new phone has a camera. See the Statler Arms parking garage in this picture? That's where I normally park.

They've added New York signage to storefronts, cafe tables to the sidewalk, and brought in a local street musician as an extra. It wasn't dirty or crowded enough to truly feel like NYC though. ;) Any and all indications that Euclid Avenue is in Cleveland have been covered up or removed -- including street signs. Even in areas that weren't blocked to traffic, they've removed street signs, which made it a joy to figure out where I was once I parked. I did discover, however, that some of the buildings have the street name chiseled into the cornerstone. I might still be wandering around there today if it weren't for that. I did get a nice view of Public Square on my way home, though, as I attempted to navigate the one-ways and no-left-turns to find my way back to I-90, again without proper signage.

Spider-Man pics from Cleveland filming

great pics here (including one of the aforementioned Avenue Q taxicab, unfortunately in black & white)

stupid freelancing

Thanks to considerable freelance income last year, I owed quite a bit more in taxes for 2005. In fact, the withholding from my employer is a little lower than it should be, so I always owe a little bit to the U.S. but still get some back from Ohio, which is fine. But figuring in the self-employment stuff, what I paid in federal taxes for 2005 was literally half of my freelance income. I just hope the IRS isn't going to make me start filing quarterly, especially since the extra income last year was sort of a fluke, and it varies from month to month anyway.

By the way, freelancing sucks. At least for tax purposes. I long for the days when all I had was a few W-2's and 1099's and could just type the numbers into TurboTax and have my 1040EZ done in an hour. *sigh*

mere details

I'm a horrible storyteller, because I often worry too much about getting the details right. A good storyteller glosses over the finer points and simply relays the general theme in an entertaining way. Unfortunately, this is also the breeding ground for urban legends, and turns folklore into a game of "telephone." Real news items often become distorted and exaggerated over time, depending on who's telling the tale and what they want their audience to hear. That's how a few isolated incidents of razor blades being hidden in Halloween candy turns into a nationwide epidemic, or a man who attached weather balloons to a lawn chair plunged to his death over the Pacific Ocean "last year" -- quite an amazing feat since he committed suicide in 1993.

One might think that mere details in storytelling are unimportant, so long as the message stays the same. Ah, but it's those details that make the message evolve as it spreads from one person to the next. Even in an age where much folklore is sent through e-mail, people edit them to suit their needs. Usually the first thing someone will add is, "This really happened!" See, it's not good enough to listen to a parable of a little boy giving blood to his sister, even though he thinks it will kill him; no no, it's much better if we claim it was a real-life event that just happened recently -- rather than a story that's been around since at least 1925. The great thing about folklore is, the fewer details you give, the harder it is to prove it false (never mind that it also makes it more difficult to prove true).

Another example is the story of "Kyle," the suicidal teenager who had his life changed by a compassionate boy from the "other" crowd. This story originally came from the first Chicken Soup for the Soul book, published in 1993, but once it splashed onto the internet in the late '90s, it suddenly took a few turns. First, the names were changed, so right off the bat, if we are to believe this is a true story, we've lost the battle. Next, a boy tripping over his own feet is instead targeted by a gang of bullies. Instead of spending a few hours together, Kyle and the boy spend the weekend together. Instead of being acquaintences throughout high school, Kyle is worked into the boy's circle of friends and becomes one of the most popular kids in school. Apparently this does wonders for his physical appearance too, as he's described as "handsome" toward the end. The cynical and skeptical Barbara Mikkelson of snopes.com also points out that "Kyle" originally told the boy this story in private, rather than revealing it at a commencement ceremony to thundrous applause; thus, the story implies that works of Good Samaritanism will be greatly rewarded, rather than some clunky old tale about two boys who barely knew each other.

I see another cynical interpretation as well. We're led to believe that, because the boy was willing to take a chance on befriending Kyle, he learned that they really weren't so different. After all, they both like football, hanging out with friends, and all the usual stuff teenagers like to do. Well, that's fine, if they really weren't so different. But what if they were? What if Kyle didn't like football, and instead enjoyed reading books and seeing musicals? Then would he have turned into the handsome and popular commencement speaker we so joyously wept with one balmy day in early June?

One could write that off as mere exaggeration of details to make for a more entertaining story, but I maintain the original version offers a better moral than the revision. In the original, we're taught that a simple act of kindness can change a person's life, whereas in the latter, it takes an entire four years of friendship and companionship (not to mention mutual tastes and interests) to effect a change.

Really, then, which is the more impressive tale?

chocobunny goodness

an old'n', but a good'n'

i'm a type B+

At first, I thought, "Oh boy, another vague, black-or-white quiz that attempts to figure out who you are." But what it came up with is actually fairly accurate, especially the last three lines:

You Have A Type B+ Personality

B+ You're a pro at going with the flow You love to kick back and take in everything life has to offer A total joy to be around, people crave your stability. While you're totally laid back, you can have bouts of hyperactivity. Get into a project you love, and you won't stop until it's done You're passionate - just selective about your passions

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

Hosanna! recap

"Hosanna!" ([1], [2]) was last night, and it went very well. Amy and I had a lot of fun, but after all the organizing, rehearsing, graphic design, and recording, I'm glad it's over with. We got a lot of compliments, and people were asking if this would be an annual event. We had just over 50 people attend, and the free-will offering raked in a cool $320 -- I never dreamed we'd get that much! That's going to the church music fund for things like choir music and piano/organ tuning.

Hopefully I'll have some time this weekend to put the CD together. For copyright reasons, this isn't something to be sold at a profit, so much like the church choir's Christmas cantata, I'll just be donating my time and selling them at cost (which doesn't really get around the legal aspects, but it at least gets around the moral aspects ;) ).

However, I'll upload one track here for you to listen to, because I arranged it all myself (originally as a choir piece with a cool piano part, but here with the violin playing the melody). This was our opening number, and the concert itself bears the same title: Hosanna! (low quality mp3, 388 K)

Here are the front and inside of the program as well.

fingernails

I have fingernails again. It's been about five days since I put neon green sticky notes on my computer screen that remind me not to chew on my fingers. I found that I would often "groom" my fingernails while staring at the screen, so I figured if I put bright green strips of paper on there, they would catch my eye and remind me of what I'm doing. So far, it's worked pretty well, and I've managed to keep my fingers out of my mouth, and the nails are growing back. Even away from the computer, I'm now more aware of when my fingers manage to rest themselves in-between my front teeth (that's right: it's the finger's fault) and am able to stop myself. So long as I train myself not to obsessively scan over my fingernails looking for things to chew off, I should be able to keep this up. I still need a nervous outlet though, so I'll probably just tap my foot more. :)

college courses

Way back in 2000 when I bought bryanbird.com and had nothing but a resume up, I also intended to include a list of courses I had completed in college. Well, here we are six years later, and I finally have said list: BGSU courses. I'm not exactly sure what purpose this serves, but enjoy.